My Search for the Nature of God

If you really know me, you will know my Father as well. From now on, you do know Him and have seen Him. John 14:7 ESV

I have been thinking, pondering, ruminating on the character of Jesus for the last year.  Don’t we always say/sing/express how we want to be like Jesus.  WWJD? Remember…All I need is Jesus. 

I truly want to be more like Jesus. But to be more like Him, I need to understand Him/watch Him/follow Him….I think that is what is called being a disciple.  Jesus may have mentioned that a time or two.

Lately I’ve been thinking what would Jesus have done during this pandemic and in turn, what would he want us to do?  Jesus never focused on the political figures of the day.  He knew His message was for His people (who were all people).  He focused on caring and teaching the people in front of Him.  

Twice He preached to large crowds and then fed them.  He healed the sick along the way. He saw those who were needy and disenfranchised.  He told stories.  He was gentle.  He dripped with kindness and love.  He didn’t judge those in messy, sinful circumstances or tell them “if that were me, I’d …..” Jesus inspired others to be followers through His kindness and true love, not force or judgement.  

Jesus only spit to heal a blind man.  He hated injustice and brought mercy to those wrongly accused or trapped in circumstances. He taught about loving your enemies, the prisoners, the widows, the orphans….the easy forgotten.  

I love this Jesus.  The real one…not the one portrayed in the world today.

I love this strong, loving Jesus. He didn’t compromise.  He didn’t condemn.  He loved and he saved.  He gave His life for everyone…you just have to believe He did and accept that gift.  

I’ve been a believer for a long, long time…since I gave my heart at my seat in the Red Oak High School Auditorium in 1982 after a Lowell Lundstrom sermon.  Through the years, I shaped the Word of God to justify my decisions and actions.  I used God as genie, a protector, a covering of blessing.  

Through hard lessons and gut-wrenching times, I have been humbled lovingly by God’s grace and mercy.  God’s word was to shape me…my actions, my intentions, my goals, my dreams.  Not the other way around.  Who knew? 

I’ve always believed and I’ve always prayed but I thought that gave me a right to be judgmental, vengeful, & dismissive.  Nothing could be farther from the truth of God.  God’s grace and mercy have only given me the right to be more loving, more humble, and more forgiving.  

What a shift in my heart. His heart…it’s not mine anymore.

Without God and His enduring mercy and love, I would have nothing.  He has lifted my humble and undeserving feet to dry ground…so that I can look for those who are drowning.  Not so I can tell them how to swim from the beach…I need to throw them a lifejacket.  Jesus is the lifejacket. Jesus is the cure for our selfishness.  He saves us from drowning in our own way.

So during this time of a pandemic, I feel my heart being called to safely love those who are scared, those who are mourning, those who are hungry, those who are still drowning in the waves of this unsettled world.  

I will share a story…that’s what I’m called to do.  I have 48 years of them.  

They won’t be as good as the originals that Jesus taught, but I’m only His disciple, a messy copy of the OG.  

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